Grief Work

Grief is an inevitable part of life. All of us suffer losses and rejections resulting in normal but difficult emotional responses. Grief often becomes complicated in American society due to the general avoidance to acknowledge our losses. In our culture we are often encouraged to “forget about it,” “put it behind us” or “be brave.” As our losses accumulate throughout life, “un-grieved” wounds can compound until we are no longer able to bear the burden of unresolved grief. Well attended grieving requires witnessing and compassion while allowing for the time and opportunity to address our sorrows, both past and present. The solution lies in resolving the wounds of distressing rejections, losses and deaths that have been carefully or unconsciously avoided or defensively dissociated. By consciously increasing awareness of buried losses, we can find meaning and make peace with our wounds. Some of the methods the therapeutic work can include are “chair work”, “love letters,” sand tray, and dreams. As a Jungian analyst I accompany my clients through the twists and turns of their lives and assist in amplifying their unconscious adventures, bringing meaning and conscious awareness to their journey. The journey to wholeness is sometimes difficult but often freeing. Grief work is a universal part of life and the journey toward acceptance and inner peace is well worth the effort. Grief work and therapy are about sharing a person’s journey before, during and/or after a death or loss. The focus is on companioning the bereaved during difficult transitions by following the emotion and finding meaning in the relationships. Simply, it is about listening to their stories, their pain, and their fears with an open mind and a true heart  

Trauma

Early childhood trauma, traumatic grief, violence and abuse all contribute to accumulated wounds to the psyche. Working with trauma survivors requires navigating accumulated and often repetitive wounds while identifying triggers and approaching fortified defenses concealed in the personal unconscious of an underdeveloped, frequently regressed, often dissociative ego. The therapeutic process demands a safe, secure, stable and consistent field where the client can strengthen their ego, approach their victim identification, manifest empowering coping skills all while holding the tension between their fear and their hope while awaiting transformation. Each client needs someone to accompany them through the difficult journey back through the halls of their personal hell while holding their hearts, hands, and mind through the terror their psychic defenses have attempted to protect them from re-experiencing. Identifying defenses structures and approaching entrenched attachment to the wounds are slow and necessary components to the therapy. Building ego strength while acknowledging ego defenses is a delicate ballet between the analyst and client. Trauma is not a lifetime sentence of painful desperation but an awful experience that can be transformed by tender attention to various unresolved feelings of victimization and powerlessness. Traumatic experience is initially an experience of pain and confusion but it can eventually become an opportunity to thrive via compassion and wholeness. Trauma is transformed by integral work with information from the client that can be both hidden and agonizingly present. The Self through dreams and images can help guide the journey we can make together toward healing and well being. This work requires perseverance and determination. It is the deep, vast treasure held within the damaged psyche that promises the possibility of healing. This work is not to be taken lightly or quickly but the peace of mind and soul’s emotional healing are worth the effort.  

Sandplay

Sandplay is a therapeutic process intended to facilitate emotional healing and personal development. Sandplay is a play therapy for young and old alike. It engages the imagination with all its transformative and healing energies. A safe space is provided where the client can choose from hundreds of tiny objects and figures to create in a sandtray a picture of her inner world. The scenes in the tray are comparable to the symbolic images that occur in dreams. Sandplay is multidimensional using eyes, hands, body, mind and spirit. It uses your senses to engage in a physical and psychological experience where the psyche can circumvent many of the mental defenses utilized to protect rigid and limited beliefs about oneself. Sandplay also engages the child within who often has access to difficult childhood experiences and connection to the meaning we made of those painful experiences using our child’s mind. By engaging this part of our psyche we can help it traverse the developmental stages that may have been missed due to trauma, neglect, or overwhelmed parents who may have come to parenting with their own developmental deficits. The therapist silently witnesses and holds sacred space allowing individuals to connect with deep psychic contents in their own time and way. Bringing symbolic contents to conscious awareness is an important part of the healing process. Analysis or interpretation may occur at a later date, if desired

Depth Psychology

Depth Psychology is designed to take a deeper look past the obvious known – into the unknown. It is an inward journey through the psyche – listening to the body, mind, and spirit to increase awareness or consciousness and reconnect to your innate divinity. Finding meaning and purpose in your life experiences often becomes increasingly important as you encounter challenges in life. Frequently, the desire to explore the deeper questions of your life surfaces well into adulthood. However, a traumatic or difficult childhood can inspire a need for understanding at a much younger age. Sometimes the yearning for self-knowledge initiates a journey and you begin grasping for insight and self-awareness. Embarking on a spiritual quest often leads to soul-searching in depth. All of these endeavors are well served by depth psychology. It is hard to understand why difficult and painful situations come into one’s life. At times, these distressing experiences arrive very early in life and cause significant changes in behaviors and relationships. Often there isn’t the time or inclination to explore them until later in life or when a devastating life change occurs. Then you might begin to grapple with the “why’s” of life which can help you to discover the rhyme and reason inherent in your individual life path. Often through suffering, you become willing to try to make sense out of seemingly senseless or random events. Whether it is your own suffering or the suffering of loved ones, you find yourself wondering over and over again “why did this or that happen to me? Or why “my” son, daughter, mother, father, wife or husband?” Until you can shine the light of consciousness on your psychological defenses and confront what is hidden behind them, you are under their control and don’t know why. People build defenses against being hurt again and do not realize the problems the defenses contain. By coming to terms with your actions and reactions you can begin to set yourself free from the limiting beliefs and derogatory messages you tell yourself. Mourning is one example of the inevitable painful emotions in life. Why do human beings try to avoid sadness when it is an integral part of life? Pain. By denying it, its’ grip strengthens and people are destined to be entwined with it. If are you are to be free from its hold, you must move through it. You can never quite be free from it if you choose to deny it or try to go around it. Finding significance and value in the unavoidable psychological injuries acquired throughout a lifetime is a soul-quest or spiritual pilgrimage through the comings and goings of life; the births and deaths, beginnings and endings, misadventures and trials that include grief, confusion, anger, disillusionment, sadness, and resentment. To face the tender longing to be loved, feel seen, make peace within and heal agonizing heartsickness requires courage and someone to witness our transformation. As human beings, we need each other. Depth psychology digs into the realm of personal stories. We need to tell our stories. Just as fables, fairytales, myths, and parables carry underlying messages, so do the personal stories of each individuals’ life. Discover and explore the signs or symbols and their meaning along the road as you make a trip to the center. As a child, did you find yourself drawn to a particular fairytale or superhero? Inherent in those preferences are clues that point to each persons’ souls objective.